The No Longer Secret Diary of One Abagail Williams
by anbuassassin
Summary: Had to write this for English. The Crucible though Abby's eyes. Beware Elizabeth bashing.
1. January 20, 1692

**Journal 1**

January 20, 1962

That little wretch. Just because she got scared that her daddy caught us, she pulls this whole act. Her and Ruth are such babies. What's the worst that can happen? We get sent to bed without supper, we're

forced to write the commandments. Big deal.

She just lies there in her bed pretending to be in a coma. Gotta give it to her though, she is a good little actor. That thing with the screaming, beautiful.

The only good thing about today was that I got to see my strong and handsome John again. Oh how I wish he would leave that horrible, lying woman he calls a wife. He deserves someone prettier, younger. Someone like me.

I thought for sure everything would start to fall apart when Reverend Hale arrived. He's suppose to be an expert witch hunter. Not that there are really witches in this village. The only thing I'm worried about is that he may not be as merciful about the dancing as Uncle has been.

My dear uncle and Reverend Hale questioned Tituba. She started naming people she had seen with the devil himself. I always knew that there was something about her. When Tituba started, Betty was suddenly just fine. We both helped Tituba name people. I just wish now that I had thought to accuse Goody Proctor. Then my love John would be all mine.

_Abigail Williams_


	2. March 28, 1692

**Journal 2**

March 28, 1692

I musta had this real dreamy look on my face because Mary asked, "What is going through your head, Abby?"

"What do you mean?" I knew exactly what she meant and I really didn't want to talk about it on my day off from the Proctors.

"The look on your face. It almost looks the same as my big sister after she stayed the night at Lucus Martin's house. Not that you'd know either of them since. . ."

"Mary, shut-up!" Sometimes her rambling could really grit my nerves.

"Sorry, Abby. I just wanted to know what had you smiling silly. You haven't smiled that much since your mamma died." She looked so down cast because of my meanness that I almost felt sorry for her, almost.

"Fine. I'll tell you, but you gotta promise not to tell a soul. You can't even write it in that diary a yours neither.

"Last night, John came into my room as I was getting ready for bed. He came up behind me and started whispering the sweetest things. He placed his hand here. He said, 'Come with me, my sweet. Come to the barn.' Then we. . ."

"You did what?" Mary eagerly edged on. I bit my lip and took a beep breath.

"We did you know." Her eyes got real wide.

"Right there with Goody Procter in the other room?"

"No, she had went out to help Goody Wilson give birth." Mary was for the first time in her life speechless.

_Abigail Williams_


	3. April 11, 1692

**Journal 3**

April 11, 1692

Oh John, how can I make you see that I'm the one you need. Your dear Elizabeth isn't the sweet God-fearing woman you think she is. She's bewitching you. She's gone and bewitched Mary, too. Why else would you have Mary turn against her friends? She wouldn't turn against us on her own neither. She knows we're right.

John how can you think I'm lying about these things? You useta think I was so lovely. You said so yourself. But after that evil woman threw me out your opinion changed. You useta to have nothing by sweet things to say about me and my body during those wonderful nights. What happened?

Believe me John, I'm only looking out for your well being. Goody Proctor is nothing but pure evil. Next thing you know she'll have your own sons after you and me both.

You denounce me because you have no control over what you say. You didn't know you were lying with the devil's whore. How do know that your sons are really yours? Leave the wretch to hang and come with me to Boston.

Leave this mess behind. The trials will be over soon. I will devote my entire self to you. I won't be strayed to the devil. There is no room in my heart for any but you John.

_Abigail Williams_


	4. August 19, 1692

**Journal 4**

August 19, 1692

My God what have I done? My life is over. My John is gone. I just wanted him for myself. I never meant for any of this to happen.

I just wanted a little fun, a little attention. Maybe for quite sometime, I wanted Goody Proctor dead. This was wrong of me. I can see this now. I can only hope my Lord and Savior will forgive me.

These trials were so wrong. The problem is that I do not believe I would be saying this if John had not died. The more I think about it the sicker I get. Not only is my beloved's blood on my hands, but so is that of Goody Nurse, Goody Bishop and all the other men and women me and my friends condemned. It was not our place to pass judgement on these good souls.

I begged and pleaded with Uncle to try and reason with John. I said I knew he were innocent that it was Goody Proctor controlling him. I gave him evidence to give John. Proof that his wife was the devil whore. But when Uncle came home for the morning meal, I knew his sullen face was for more than Betty.

I know not where to go from here. I have nothing left to live for. I can only hope with God's providence that I can restart my life free of sin. I know I will never love another as I love John.

_Abigail Williams_


End file.
